Episode 151: Growing Up

Speaker 0 (0:09): Welcome back to another episode of a record my father. Today, we're gonna be talking about what it's like to have your kid grow up into an adult. What happens when you watch a child grow from a bean sprout into a full sprout? What do you what how was that? What'd you think of that?

Speaker 1 (0:27): It was it was easy. I didn't do anything. Yeah. No. I I I look at it, and I think that it's a path that I'm very, very, very happy that I traveled.

Speaker 1 (0:40): It's something that I have, it's weird. I think I've learned more from you than you've learned from me. I've become introspective about things that I do that you do that make me go, oh, he does those because I did that. And then I would think about them. And just just, you know, also and, of course, the bad habits, those reflect the most.

Speaker 1 (1:05): But, you know, me the cussing, I cuss a lot, and I should cuss less, and there's really not a point to it. It used to be a it used to be a reason to get people's attention, but it doesn't really do it anymore unless you get really nasty vulgar. And I've never been a really nasty vulgar person. I just say, you know, the f word all the time. So that's my that's my thing.

Speaker 1 (1:28): I don't know why. I just I I work construction. I picked it up and and I and I used to be able to turn it off really, really easy. And I well, I think I still can. Well, I think I struggled with that as a kid.

Speaker 0 (1:41): Yeah. Because, I mean, you you have to learn how to filter your language. Right? When you're in third grade, you can't, use fuck as a conjunction. It just doesn't work too well.

Speaker 0 (1:53): And I remember growing up and that being a problem, learning how to filter like it is for any kid. I mean, I think like, what is it? Like around second, third grade, You learn how to say swear words, something like that. Yeah. And I think it's early.

Speaker 0 (2:06): You think it's early?

Speaker 1 (2:07): Oh, well, you were you were were five years old. It was the funniest thing in the world. And I know this not everybody says this is funny, but it was funny. And the wife could verify because she's behind me and we're just talking about the other day. Uncle Doggy, he's not your uncle, but he might as well be.

Speaker 1 (2:23): He you had this little drivey car. You know, this little you had a pink Jeep of all things. And he came over and said, a Jeep is a shitty vehicle. You need to drive Fords and only Fords. And he gave you these decals for Fords.

Speaker 1 (2:36): And you're out in the garage at the house that we live here. So you're like, this is 2003, maybe 2004. And you're out there and you have a little you're a little you had a a Bob the Builder tool set, and you were hitting on the Jeep with the hammer, and you had a screwdriver, and you're putting the stuff on it. And I walked out, I'm watching. I'm just like, wow.

Speaker 1 (2:55): This is cool. This is really neat. He's, like, exploring and trying to learn and trying to build things. And you looked up at me and you smile and go, fuck you, daddy. And then you look back down.

Speaker 1 (3:06): And my wife just opened the door. She's right behind me. She sees she hears you say this, and I just, like, froze. And I didn't say anything, and I just moved on. I said, so how's the how's the Jeep going or something to that effect?

Speaker 1 (3:23): And then we carried on a conversation after that, and I didn't even acknowledge that you said, fuck you, daddy. And I mean, you were very clear in how you said it. I didn't know why, but you had the biggest grin on your face. Fuck you, daddy. You know?

Speaker 1 (3:38): And I was just like, that was it was so comical because you weren't like saying it in anger or anything so I couldn't, but I couldn't laugh because then you would say it all the time to make me laugh, which would not be a good thing to teach you. And I couldn't scold you because then you'd be like, oh, I can't say, you know, don't say whatever and you woulda

Unknown Speaker (3:58): Well, you tell a kid not to do something and then they they trip a hold on him. Right? You immediately were

Speaker 1 (4:03): gonna teach everybody in preschool. Hey. I know two really bad words. My dad told me they're really bad words. But you after that, I mean, you you didn't really cuss that much in front of us.

Speaker 1 (4:14): Occasionally, there was I don't remember damn. I I don't I don't remember that as being some big thing. No no teacher ever commented on your cussing. No one ever was never brought up with us that you had a filthy mouth. Nothing like that.

Speaker 1 (4:29): You you never you're you're not a name caller. None of that stuff.

Speaker 0 (4:32): It I remember arose. Swearing at home quite a bit though. When I was in, like, fourth or fifth grade. I remember that.

Unknown Speaker (4:40): No. Maybe you went through a phase. And I am thinking

Unknown Speaker (4:42): phase. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (4:43): Well, when I'm in my full, you know, blooming candor of cuss cusserabilia, I don't tend to notice what other people got so

Unknown Speaker (4:55): The encyclopedic knowledge of

Speaker 1 (4:58): Yeah. So maybe that's the reason that it never happened. But I think about, you know, through the years, like, what's it like to have a grown man sitting across the you know, where we do this weekly podcast once one hour a week. And it's like, it's a it's it's a wonderful trip. It's a wonderful path.

Speaker 1 (5:16): But, you know, it's like it's funny. It's the way I mem I I don't remember all of it. I remember, like, points where we did this, and we did this, and this, and this. And they're, like, super memorable points. They're like, I remember the, your frustration and, at the skate park or and then we built a skate park in the back, a big skate park, and you could not do a kickflip.

Speaker 1 (5:43): And you were just so freaked out about it, and you were so angry about it. And you just get just crazy angry. And then you did one. I think it was two years. Two years

Unknown Speaker (5:53): Oh, yeah.

Unknown Speaker (5:54): That was focusing and focusing and focusing. I remember, we went to the hardware store because you wanted to buy because you wanted to build something. You were like, daddy, daddy, we gotta go to the hardware store because I gotta go build something because you couldn't say the words right.

Unknown Speaker (6:10): It was so funny.

Unknown Speaker (6:11): I'm like, okay. You know, I'm like, hey. He wants to build something. He's five. I don't give a damn.

Unknown Speaker (6:15): You know, he told me to fuck off.

Unknown Speaker (6:16): So that must be good at something.

Speaker 1 (6:18): Anyway, we go and you bought you bought four wheels. You bought some and you bought springs. And I was like, what's that for? He goes, wow. I'm gonna figure it out.

Unknown Speaker (6:27): You know? And I was just The shocks. That's what you

Unknown Speaker (6:30): gotta do. You gotta put shocks.

Unknown Speaker (6:31): Silliest thing in the world, and we put it all together, and we bought it, and all that kind of stuff. Oh, man.

Unknown Speaker (6:36): I remember that.

Unknown Speaker (6:36): We came back. We made a little sled that rolled down.

Unknown Speaker (6:39): Yeah. We rolled down the hill on it. That was great.

Speaker 1 (6:41): Yeah. Yeah. But it was like that that was your idea. But you didn't realize that the wheels you got were like

Unknown Speaker (6:48): Shopping car wheels?

Speaker 1 (6:50): Well, they're more like, you know, the wheels that you slide up when you're doing working underneath a car so you can slide in any direction. It's no problem. That is not something that you wanna steer down a hill. No. I mean, at least from our engineering standpoint, it was stupid.

Speaker 1 (7:06): But, you know, we we did it. We learned and we learned something. You know? Just like

Unknown Speaker (7:10): What an accident.

Speaker 1 (7:11): When we we have a a run or a creek that runs behind our house called the Scotts Run. We walked up the Scotts Run all the way to the front. I remember. And going in the puddles and all that kind of stuff. And then the water was two feet deep, which is, like, to your waist.

Speaker 1 (7:29): You know? And there's just so many places and times and things like that. There, of course, were many bad things too. You know?

Unknown Speaker (7:37): Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 (7:37): You you were you were I remember you were, we were we were in the back creek. And remember when the the girl and the two guys were there?

Unknown Speaker (7:45): No.

Speaker 1 (7:45): And you you couldn't you I mean, you couldn't hit our house when you were six feet away from it throwing stuff at it. You were that you're you were like the wife was, very, very clumsy. She said I would. When I was when I was six years old, my mother put me in a skateboard I mean, into ice skating because I would fall down just standing up. I couldn't balance on him.

Unknown Speaker (8:07): Kinda like that.

Speaker 1 (8:08): You were that that you were

Unknown Speaker (8:09): I'm still that way.

Speaker 1 (8:11): You know, if I said throw a rock at a window, you would hit something off to the right or something.

Unknown Speaker (8:15): Yeah. I don't know if I could do it.

Speaker 1 (8:16): But you were throwing rock everybody was throwing rocks in the water. You picked up to throw the rock in the water, and you hit the girl in the back there.

Speaker 0 (8:22): Oh, wow. I don't remember that.

Speaker 1 (8:25): I remember that. She cried and and you you were like,

Unknown Speaker (8:28): I I I and

Speaker 1 (8:30): then you started crying and then it was just like, because you didn't mean to and but it's still and you know, what's the lesson learned here?

Speaker 0 (8:39): Don't throw rocks around.

Speaker 1 (8:40): No. The lesson is is I just shouldn't have been there, so you could have dealt with it yourself.

Unknown Speaker (8:46): Oh my gosh.

Speaker 1 (8:47): Because I'm not I was not an adult at that point. I was I'm still learning. I'm still working on that adult thing.

Unknown Speaker (8:52): But I think we

Speaker 1 (8:53): all think about through the years, all the different things that have happened. I go there, and then I go, probably, scouting when we went to Camp Goshen and we climbed up the mountain. Remember that?

Unknown Speaker (9:07): I don't remember the mountain. I remember the trebuchet. Yep. Remember that? That was That was cool.

Speaker 0 (9:13): Funny. And Yeah. And the wagon in the woods.

Speaker 1 (9:17): The wagon in the woods when you and the kids got out. We had brought a wagon. We're the only guys that brought a wagon, and you were down the I mean, it was full woods, and you and the kids were getting on the wagon. You're going, like, 30 feet. And you go down the hill, and you ram and roll over and fall over.

Speaker 1 (9:34): And and and a bunch of kids were with you and you're having a great time and then and then, of course, me not caring. Oh, the kids are gonna get hurt. And I'm like, probably not. You know, I had another I had another guy come over and he's like, oh, that's cool, man. I don't think parents would allow him to do that.

Speaker 1 (9:52): And he and one of his kids was the one that was jumping in with you. Mhmm. And I was like, you know, I I I figure if they get hurt, they'll stop. And you guys never got hurt, and then I think one of the other over, what do you call it, worried parents. Of course, I mean, you coulda hit a tree.

Speaker 1 (10:11): You coulda cracked your skull. You coulda broke your arm. You coulda I mean, you coulda done anything. Coulda a wagon, Big rubber teed tealed wagon going down a relatively steep hill.

Unknown Speaker (10:22): It was pretty steep. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (10:24): And and not in not in an open forest. This was a crowded forest where you would narrowly through three or four trees. I mean, I guess you could think of Sonny Bono when he was skiing and he ran into a tree.

Unknown Speaker (10:36): Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 (10:36): You never got the you did not get that much momentum. You were going you were just going, like, you know, one mile an hour or something like that. So the biggest thing you were gonna get was gonna be a broken wrist. That's what I think. And you're a little kid, you got rubber bands, rubber bands for arms.

Speaker 1 (10:52): So none of that stuff ever broke. It just bent and you screamed a lot and cried, and and that was the end of it. So I didn't think there was gonna be anything that's gonna happen. I wasn't worried about it. I just waited until somebody came along that was a lot more responsible and made me stop.

Speaker 1 (11:08): That was kind of the way my life went with you. And then what? We think about all the different times. We had, the trips that we took to, like, Vietnam and Turkey on bicycle. You got into biking and

Unknown Speaker (11:22): stuff like arduous trips too. Like, remember. They were painful. They weren't even I

Unknown Speaker (11:27): think they were

Speaker 0 (11:27): labeled as intermediate or beginner trips. Back roads. Back roads. And yeah, they were not. Turkey's like 90 degrees outside every day.

Speaker 0 (11:36): Yeah. And I remember how steep some of those climbs were on on the bike and how, wow, Like, it was really, really steep. You need to go on the lowest gear in order to even get to the top of the hill.

Speaker 1 (11:49): And we ended up hopping in the van and driving it behind you while you were driving up with the with the one overzealous guy that was there with his kid. Remember that?

Unknown Speaker (11:57): Oh, with the the people

Unknown Speaker (12:00): from California. Was it the the It was a me. Auto people.

Unknown Speaker (12:03): Yeah. Oh.

Speaker 1 (12:10): Guy's vacation because of the way that he had to be in front, and he had to beat his kid every time, and you were just

Unknown Speaker (12:18): That was odd. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (12:19): And the kid was not competitive at all. He was sort of like, yeah, dad. You're really fast on a bicycle. Was he the ski racer? He was

Speaker 0 (12:27): the ski racer kid. Right?

Speaker 1 (12:29): No. The ski racer kid was a different family, and that was Turkey.

Unknown Speaker (12:33): I'm talking about Vietnam. Okay. You're talking about

Speaker 1 (12:35): I mean, was that was this Turkey also? That might have been Turkey also.

Speaker 0 (12:38): Turkey was the ski racer family and then also the two guys and their nephew.

Speaker 1 (12:45): Right. Right. Right. The gay guys from Portland.

Unknown Speaker (12:48): Yes.

Speaker 1 (12:49): He was a city councilman there, and then there was also another lawyer from, I think, San Francisco and his son. Yes. And that was the other one. And I, you

Speaker 0 (12:58): know I don't even remember those people.

Speaker 1 (12:59): I remember them vaguely because the kid was probably a year older than you or maybe two.

Speaker 0 (13:08): Well, I'll ask you what inspired you to do a bike tour of all things. Because that is the most random thing I

Speaker 1 (13:14): can think. I saw back roads and I said, wow. This is cool. I figured it's gonna be light riding. And also, you know what I wanted?

Speaker 1 (13:22): We got to go on a goulette, which is like

Speaker 0 (13:24): Oh, that was amazing. Was like a

Speaker 1 (13:26): wooden ship that's made that's a Christopher Columbus style ship that you sleep in. And and it was weird because they were supposed to have twice the number of guests that they had, but this is when Turkey was there was they were having a whole bunch of the turmoil was that Turkey was Istanbul was trying to shut down the last green area in Turkey, and people come out and protest. And then they had, like we went to the area and saw it, they had two two long buses full of guys with m p fives, all the military stuff and all the equipment, guns and stuff like that. But anyway, there was the one guy on the we had the bicycle part, and then he had the boating part. And we went to Bodrum, and we came out and around.

Speaker 1 (14:17): And we went to the I think it's the Sea Of Cleopatra, which is just this side of Iran. And we we parked in inside there, and we all and you could get off the boat, and you're jumping, like, 15 feet to the water, but the water was, like, 80 degrees or something. It was it was the Mediterranean. It was just amazing.

Speaker 0 (14:36): Yeah. Bodrum was great. In Einstein too.

Unknown Speaker (14:39): Like Yeah.

Speaker 0 (14:40): The the city was so crowded with cars. That is such a liability that we biked down from the top of the the city to the bottom and like through the cars

Speaker 1 (14:52): and

Unknown Speaker (14:52): everything like that.

Unknown Speaker (14:53): Yeah. That was

Speaker 0 (14:54): not a bike friendly city. And I remember there was a guy that almost got T boned if I remember correctly going to the intersection. And like what a liability that is, right? My God.

Unknown Speaker (15:05): And then and then you you raised the liability level completely. Oh, yeah. They got really mad at me. Yeah. I remember that.

Speaker 1 (15:11): Yeah. When you when you went to shore on a little boat, jumped out, and ran into the woods. And now this is a cove, and we are bordering Iran. And this is we were at a friendly time, but it's Turkey. Turkey and Iran were friends.

Speaker 1 (15:29): It wasn't a big deal. But, I mean, you were miles away from it, but I can't you know, for whatever we were close, but we were, like, still miles away. You ran into the woods and and and it was like they were saying, like, where's Zach? Where's Zach? And I said, he's on the oh, he's not.

Speaker 1 (15:44): Oh, he went and then one of the kids goes, he ran into the woods. When? Oh, about ten minutes ago. And the guy just, like, immediately freaked out. And he goes, there's wild boar in there.

Speaker 1 (15:55): There's animals that can kill him. And he that's what he tells me.

Unknown Speaker (16:00): I don't know if I believe

Speaker 1 (16:01): I I didn't. I don't know if I believe that. A parent Yeah. And someone tells you your kid's life is in danger, it it isn't about I'm not gonna sit there and argue. No, man.

Unknown Speaker (16:13): A poor would only maim him and rip his leg off. No. It might poke out his eye.

Speaker 0 (16:17): Well, no. Because it was like Teddy Roosevelt Island size. It wasn't even like that big of an island.

Unknown Speaker (16:22): Well, was.

Unknown Speaker (16:23): And I'm like, yeah, that's.

Speaker 1 (16:24): It was a it was a pivot and it really it was it was it an island at all?

Speaker 0 (16:28): It was. It it was an island. Yeah. And it was like Teddy Roosevelt's side.

Unknown Speaker (16:32): I thought it was a peninsula.

Speaker 0 (16:33): I was gone for maybe ten minutes, and everybody thought, that the world was

Speaker 1 (16:38): gonna explode. Out, and they all ran looking for you. And, well, I think the thing is is that they did not handle it in They freaked way.

Unknown Speaker (16:48): Yeah.

Speaker 1 (16:48): They should have said, oh, you guys just wait right here. We're gonna go hit the shore, and we're gonna go inland, we'll find them. It won't it won't be that long. If they had said that, your mother your mother was crying on the deck.

Speaker 0 (17:00): I I it was maybe ten minutes too. It was maybe ten minutes that I was gone.

Speaker 1 (17:04): It was it was that. When you were four and five, you were, as, some would say, a little shit. And when we would we would go to we go to, like, Montgomery Wards or Sears or one of those stores. Oh, yeah. Run away.

Unknown Speaker (17:20): Yeah. Huge coat racks. You immediately go in there and you'd hide under one. You know, as soon as you got away from your mother, you'd hide away. I love that.

Unknown Speaker (17:29): Freaking you guys out.

Unknown Speaker (17:31): Well, because

Speaker 0 (17:31): But this wasn't that, though. This was

Speaker 1 (17:33): Yeah. Was me walking in there. Middle of nowhere in a foreign country.

Speaker 0 (17:39): On an island. But it's it's an insulated island. I walked away for maybe ten minutes at that. Yeah. I think at that point, I had already turned around.

Speaker 1 (17:47): Well, have was able to go from the boat, which was a 100 meters offshore to the shore, and I was able to go about half to three quarters of a mile inland. So it was more than ten minutes. And then I had to get you, because we were yelling, and you we were yelling, and you could not hear us. That's how far away you were. I guess.

Speaker 1 (18:15): Okay. So we went into the woods, and we were yelling, you couldn't hear us. And we got closer, then we yelled. Then And when we got too close enough, then yeah, we yelled enough that we scared the hell out of you and you cried and that, you know, and he came back.

Unknown Speaker (18:28): So mad. I was like, I don't know. You guys are

Unknown Speaker (18:30): And then everything was good.

Unknown Speaker (18:31): You guys are silly. But

Unknown Speaker (18:32): But, yeah, I I think the thing is is that you you

Unknown Speaker (18:35): You got travel insurance for a reason. You know? Yeah. We could have made

Unknown Speaker (18:39): some money there.

Unknown Speaker (18:40): You got

Speaker 1 (18:40): travel insurance for unknown of what will happen to your offspring is just very it's it's a horrible thing. You know? You you hear about all the stuff today where kids people's kids are dying and stuff and and the wars and stuff. And I'm just like, oh my gosh. I don't I I could not it would you know?

Speaker 1 (18:59): What is it I what is it that Dan Aykroyd says on the Coneheads?

Speaker 0 (19:04): I don't know. I never liked that movie.

Speaker 1 (19:06): No. No. No. I never liked that movie. Says that if if Bill Jorn died, what would you do?

Speaker 1 (19:11): And he goes, I would go into the I would go into the room. I would shut the curtains. I would draw the blinds. I cut off the lights, and I would cease to exist. Wow.

Unknown Speaker (19:27): Every time I think about that, I cry. It makes me go. That that's the reason I watched that movie. That touches me. Very weird.

Unknown Speaker (19:37): You know? The coneheads was always

Unknown Speaker (19:40): were off putting for me. And I just It was

Speaker 1 (19:41): a feeling. It was truly a feeling. It truly evoked a feeling in me that I could understand that if you lost something that you had that connection to, which that's you, that that is what it would be. It would be.

Speaker 0 (19:57): Well, you got a 152 episodes now that you can listen to.

Unknown Speaker (20:01): If the So I don't Fuck. I don't need you anymore.

Speaker 0 (20:04): No. Exactly. You basically have all hours.

Unknown Speaker (20:07): Oh, they might listen to this

Speaker 0 (20:08): and say you have too much of of a good thing. You know?

Speaker 1 (20:12): So we've we've done we've done we've done

Unknown Speaker (20:15): Well, let me get an exact number.

Speaker 1 (20:17): We did the water. 52. We did the we we did that. Vietnam, we wrote we I I see, I think it's funny. I remember trips.

Speaker 1 (20:25): Remember sports. I remember you playing football.

Speaker 0 (20:27): Do you remember the snowballs that we threw at the window? Remember that?

Unknown Speaker (20:31): Snowballs we threw at the window.

Speaker 0 (20:33): We used to throw snowballs at the windows when mom was inside. Yeah. Yeah. I remember

Unknown Speaker (20:39): that. So pissed off.

Unknown Speaker (20:40): You're really mad about that. We also used to throw dirt clods at each other. I remember that.

Speaker 1 (20:45): Were you with me when the when the snow was, a foot deep and we went up to, the neighbor's house and knocked on their door and asked them for a drink.

Speaker 0 (20:53): 2012? Yeah. Yeah. We I was there. Yeah.

Speaker 0 (20:57): I was there. Oh, this

Unknown Speaker (21:00): They just looked at me like, oh my god. You're crazy. Wait a Crazy.

Unknown Speaker (21:04): Yeah. That's interesting. All

Speaker 1 (21:06): the all the times. Mhmm. Your graduation, of course, from high school, your graduation from UVA, the idea, the letter when you got the letter from UVA that you got accepted. I start to think about the the really the wonderful things.

Unknown Speaker (21:26): Well, you know what's not good?

Unknown Speaker (21:28): What?

Speaker 0 (21:29): I'm looking at our Spotify.

Speaker 1 (21:30): I mean, I remember the horrible times too. Yeah. And and and there there are there are many of those and those are very those are deep troves. But I guess that, you know, have to learn how to

Unknown Speaker (21:47): It's kinda weird. Is the You

Speaker 1 (21:49): have to like you have to like the Troves. Otherwise, you don't get the waves. You know? Yeah. No.

Speaker 1 (21:56): It's I that's part of living. I mean, if it was all, you know, happiness and, what is it? Candy balls and lollipop or girls, then it would be, I think that's a porn. Anyway, I think

Unknown Speaker (22:10): That does sound like a porn.

Speaker 1 (22:11): Yeah. I think it what are you looking at?

Speaker 0 (22:13): No. I'm looking at this because it's weird on Spotify. Episode one fifty wasn't published on Spotify, but it was published on Apple podcast. Which doesn't make any sense to me whatsoever. But, well, that's a problem that needs to be fixed.

Speaker 0 (22:29): Even though it's listed on the Spotify under Anchor, which is Yeah. Other upsetting, but we'll we'll see what happens.

Unknown Speaker (22:36): And another thing.

Speaker 0 (22:36): That's what I was looking at. But no. Yeah. What are

Unknown Speaker (22:40): we So we can have two one fifties

Speaker 0 (22:42): The most. Well, what is it like to see, to no longer well, I guess you still kinda raise a kid, right, when he's an adult? What what do you think about that?

Speaker 1 (22:49): I think that I think that there's a, like, there's a line of demarcation. There or there's multiple lines. When he went into high school, that was sort of a line where there was a a growing distance. When he moved from the house into the studio up here when you were, like, 17 or 18 and then

Speaker 0 (23:08): Oh, I was 20, I think, at that point.

Unknown Speaker (23:09): 20. 20. When he went to school.

Speaker 0 (23:11): He would kill each other during the pandemic, I think we decided. Yeah. Yeah. And Well, that

Speaker 1 (23:15): pandemic was crazy too because it was just like alcohol fest, you know?

Speaker 0 (23:20): Oh, yeah. Yeah. I think we got drunk every two days for a year. Yeah. And it was, that was a lot.

Speaker 0 (23:26): And I remember it got to a point to where I think we'd split a fifth and I wasn't drunk anymore. And I was like, okay, this might be a problem. This might be a problem.

Speaker 1 (23:39): Yeah, was a it was a problem. And everybody came over and we we kept doing it. We kept doing it. We kept doing it. And I look back at that.

Speaker 1 (23:45): But you look at it, it's like that year, alcohol sales nationally were up 64%. Usually, they rise one to 2%. We missed

Speaker 0 (23:55): that one, didn't we? We missed that one on the Yeah. The books.

Speaker 1 (23:59): Yeah. All those guys went in. Well, they're now going through the floor because everybody's drying out because they realized that none of them have livers. They see these old their all their parents died early because they they they consumed 10 worth of liquor in one, you know, pretty much.

Unknown Speaker (24:15): Well, I think people

Unknown Speaker (24:15): are more

Speaker 0 (24:16): about my age. Maybe it's because of the onset of amphetamine being introduced to children but really heavy drug use. More so like molly, ecstasy, cocaine, ketamine. Ketamine is a huge thing which I don't think ketamine was a thing when you were a teenager, was it? Were people doing ketamine like a k now?

Unknown Speaker (24:37): Yeah. Is that called special k?

Unknown Speaker (24:39): I I think so. I think it's the same.

Speaker 1 (24:40): Well, I mean, we smoked it. That's what I remember. I remember smoking.

Unknown Speaker (24:44): Didn't know you could do that.

Speaker 1 (24:45): But I don't remember it being all that in a bag of sand cause it's like a lot of things that that

Speaker 0 (24:50): Well, we not we, but my generation snorts it and you cannot snort a lot of it because it will k hole you. And basically it's like tunnel vision. And then it goes like this around your we'll say you like Yeah. Do too much too quickly because you can really only do like less than a bump. Like, no, not less.

Speaker 0 (25:11): Yeah. But like about a bump or two depending on your tolerance.

Unknown Speaker (25:14): Yeah. Whatever a bump is. I don't know what that is. How much is a bump?

Speaker 0 (25:16): The smallest amount that you could possibly do because you really gotta test it or else it'll body lock you for an hour and you cannot move. Like you will see yourself in the third person through your eyes. Like, that's how it is. It's really dystopic. But no, that is what even Europe is having a problem with that currently.

Speaker 0 (25:37): Yeah. Oh my gosh. Yeah. It's really bad for your kidneys too. It can cause kidney crystallization which is really really not good.

Speaker 0 (25:46): Like there are people that have had to do kidney transplants because of their disease. Oh. Yeah. Very early on too. It's a very rapid kind of deal.

Speaker 0 (25:54): Depending on your.

Unknown Speaker (25:54): Freon's not good for you either.

Speaker 0 (25:56): No, I wouldn't say so. Freon, huffing is not really in the books. It's kind of funny that people do quote unquote healthy recreational drugs now that are I mean, I guess cocaine and ecstasy is really what

Unknown Speaker (26:13): Well, I don't think those are really healthy. I think that

Speaker 0 (26:14): Well, that's why I'm saying quote unquote. Yeah. Healthy.

Speaker 1 (26:18): I think a healthy drug drug might be a gummy with THC in it to put you to sleep.

Speaker 0 (26:24): The soft hard drugs is kind of what I was referring to. Yeah. But, yeah, I don't know about that. That's crazy. That's a crazy world out there now.

Speaker 0 (26:34): But, no, I remember what else? Graduating from high school.

Unknown Speaker (26:38): What did you think about that? That was a that was a time. I taped the whole thing. I watched it. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (26:43): You were still broken. No. Yeah. No. Graduated from high school because you dated a girl for three years and then, what, three weeks before the end or six weeks or three months into it or the first quarter or whatever it was.

Unknown Speaker (26:56): Yeah.

Speaker 1 (26:56): It was breakup time. She decided to break up, I think. You were crushed.

Unknown Speaker (27:01): Yeah.

Speaker 1 (27:01): You knew you were you both knew you were at the

Speaker 0 (27:04): end of it, but Oh, definitely. They weren't ready to let go. Acceptance. Right? But then all of my quote unquote, I'll use that term again, friends had sex with her, and that was great.

Speaker 0 (27:15): I mean, what are you gonna do? Didn't. Well, yeah. But you're my father. I would hope

Unknown Speaker (27:18): you Okay.

Speaker 0 (27:19): That's true. Anyway. But no. And then, well, it's kind interesting.

Unknown Speaker (27:24): That would have been a that would have been a deal breaker for Well, you know what's funny

Speaker 0 (27:28): is when my cousin graduated, the father, I guess, my uncle was like, what advice would you give him? And I'm like, he should be prepared to be hurt by the people that he thinks that are closest to him in his life. He should be prepared for ultimate backstabbing preparations. He should be ready for that. And because you should really never trust the people And other than your, your family, I would say your family, your your immediate family, and your I I don't I I don't Immediate family meaning father, mother.

Speaker 1 (28:01): You build I build relationships with people. Mhmm. And some of them are with my immediate family. Some of them with my, like, family of, like, what I grew up family. And some of them are with people that are outside of the family.

Speaker 1 (28:20): I would say that in any given one, depending upon layers of relationship, is how much I can depend on them. Over time, I've learned that I have limited amount of time to spend with certain people. And also, there are people that I wanna spend time with, so I schedule it. And I've I've been I've been very methodical about this. I've been doing it for about a year and a half now since I started retiring.

Speaker 1 (28:48): I'm saying, okay. You know, I didn't see doggies very often. So I said, we we would see each other. Yeah. We're gonna yeah.

Speaker 1 (28:53): We'll get together soon. And I'm like, soon never happens. So we scheduled it quarterly, and I said, you can move it. It's not a big deal. It's just you know, we're gonna do it the week of three months from now.

Speaker 1 (29:04): Because you can always plan a date three months from now. And I do that with every one of my people that are remote. I say, I'll see you in three months. And they're like, what? And I'm like, yeah.

Speaker 1 (29:13): I'll see you in three months. And so I've made it my my thing to stay connected to people that I love and the people I'm really connected to and I'm close to, and I would do anything for, and they would do anything for me. And I think that that is something that relationships are two way. You've got to put it to get it, and you can't be looking to get it by what you put into it.

Speaker 0 (29:40): I believe reciprocation is a thing. Do believe in that. Yes.

Unknown Speaker (29:44): But if it's thought about

Speaker 0 (29:45): so many times that it's like, why am I the only one doing anything reaching out? And then I stopped and then it gets real quiet. It gets real quiet. And then you're like, was the relationship even worth it? Right.

Speaker 0 (29:58): And it wasn't. It wasn't ever. If they're not going to reciprocate either and it's not

Unknown Speaker (30:04): a You have a car, you drive.

Unknown Speaker (30:05): It's a time

Unknown Speaker (30:07): Yeah. You have good drugs. Exactly. You had the pool, you know.

Speaker 0 (30:12): It's always things like that. But then you have to look at yourself and you're like, well, everybody wants something. Everybody wants something. No matter how close they are to you, everybody wants something except for a very few specific people. And that's why I don't trust about 90% of the people I meet.

Speaker 0 (30:31): You you don't, you should be very hesitant. And that's why I gave that advice to my cousin because you should be very ready for those people that you trust with your whole heart to just stab you right in the back. Because it does. It happened to me and I wasn't ready and it destroyed me for like two to three I think I think it was two to three years after high school that I was like,

Unknown Speaker (30:53): I had these trust issues. You were messed up for

Speaker 0 (30:56): I had these trust issues and I couldn't really, I didn't wanna make friends because, I mean, when you get screwed over at that young age to such an extent that it could almost be in a movie. You know, they're like Well, it's funny that you were you were plot. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (31:11): You you were like nine people in the class, and and you all were a close close group. And then when you guys broke up, you you were six of you were all friends, and then they became her friend. Oh, yeah. Wanna get in her pants.

Unknown Speaker (31:27): Exactly. Which happened.

Speaker 1 (31:29): Yep. And she accommodated it.

Unknown Speaker (31:30): So Exactly. What are

Speaker 1 (31:32): gonna do? I I don't you know, and they were they were your pretend friends.

Unknown Speaker (31:38): Oh, yeah. Definitely. You when

Speaker 1 (31:40): you found that out? And then you did have some that stuck around with you, and they stuck around with you for a while, but they were kinda you wanted friends. You needed friends, and I think that they they they were they filled the bill at the time.

Speaker 0 (31:56): Well, I mean, they skated. They were in that world. Right.

Speaker 1 (31:59): They had like interest. That's the that was the that was the level

Unknown Speaker (32:03): of friendship.

Speaker 1 (32:03): Yeah. Let's get high. Let's go skate. Let's let's do this. And I, you know, I did that in my teens, in my twenties, same kind of stuff.

Unknown Speaker (32:12): If you're in a

Speaker 0 (32:12): high school and you're not smoking marijuana every day, I highly urge you to start. You know? Yes. Yes. It helps you get really far and it helps you explore.

Speaker 0 (32:24): You know what's funny though is I think that me doing that, me probably smoking weed every day for the time I was 15 or 16 until I was 20.

Unknown Speaker (32:32): 75.

Speaker 0 (32:33): Probably like inertly, inertly. Yeah. Something like that. But disregarded later, later issues with drugs and alcohol. I think that that because there's a lot of people that find drugs and alcohol when they're 25.

Speaker 0 (32:47): And I think that that is a lot harder than when you experiment when you're younger. You know? Same thing. We can look at your brands.

Unknown Speaker (32:54): You're now a person who needs responsibility.

Unknown Speaker (32:57): If you're

Speaker 1 (32:57): gonna do something that's irresponsible, you should do it when people expect you to be Exactly. Irresponsible.

Unknown Speaker (33:02): Oh, I love that. That's great.

Speaker 1 (33:04): You know what I mean? It's not, it's it's it's not, you know, it's like right now, now I can smoke weed. It's okay now, but it wasn't when I was that age.

Unknown Speaker (33:14): Well, it was highly illegal too when you were a

Speaker 1 (33:17): Well, no. In the 70 no. Not if you're a white guy. No. Not if you're a white guy.

Speaker 1 (33:21): I mean, they would, the cops would confiscate it. Oh. I had weed confiscated four times. Berkeley. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (33:31): Burke well, Burke Lake was once I was pulling out with my best man at my wedding, but this is we were not this is more 1817. He's just got off work, and we're gonna go get high. And he takes a wide turn out of the gas station that he works at. And the cops pull us over for a bad turn, and they ask for the registration. It's in his glove box.

Speaker 1 (33:54): He opens up his glove box, and a bong rolls out.

Unknown Speaker (33:58): And they take us to a car.

Speaker 1 (33:59): They make us stand there. They look at the back. Blah blah blah. You know? Another time, I was at Rumscoe Creek Park, and I had weed, and we came out.

Speaker 1 (34:11): And, but I didn't get caught there. They they they tore my car apart, and they didn't find it was under the front seat. I was like, I was just, like, shocked that they were that stupid. They went in the trunk. They did everything that they didn't look under the front seat.

Speaker 0 (34:23): Thankfully, it was nothing harder than that, though.

Speaker 1 (34:26): No. It's just weed. And then and then I had them do me again. I went to buy some drugs from a guy named, the cat. It was after the cat scratch fever, and they'd say the cat.

Unknown Speaker (34:39): The cat's scratching, man. And that means he's scorned weed. The cat's scratching. He's got the fever, and that many was given really good counts. That's so funny.

Speaker 1 (34:48): So you go to his and you wouldn't go to the front door, which his bedroom was, like, to the left in the front. You would go around to the side of the house and walk up to the side, and there was a there was a pathway. And as soon as where you walked up and you knocked on his his bedroom window, which was, like, 10 nine, probably seven feet off the ground. And he'd lean up, and he he'd pull up in the window. How can I serve you, sir?

Speaker 1 (35:11): And he and he pulled out a balance beam right there, triple scale, and he put on whatever was on it. You'd see it there. Yeah. That's what I want. Okay.

Speaker 1 (35:18): And he put in a baggie and sell it to you and do the transaction right there. I mean, just and I went there, and it didn't have any. And then I'm driving out, and the cops were watching the place. And then they pulled me over, and they're like, where why'd you stop there? And I was like, well, because, he owed me some money.

Unknown Speaker (35:38): And I mean, just

Speaker 0 (35:40): It's pretty good. Pretty good thinking on your feet now.

Unknown Speaker (35:43): He owed me money. Say, how did I I I went over to get it. Yeah. But were you buying drugs? Where are the drugs, man?

Speaker 1 (35:51): I don't have any drugs, man. I didn't. Was really cool.

Unknown Speaker (35:54): And I I feel like cops in the seventies.

Speaker 1 (35:56): I did not bring my paraphernalia with me because I had a really big giant red bong at that time, and I didn't bring it with me. And I left it at home, and it was just one of those things that I really I never carried a bong in a car after I got pulled over that first time with Peter. You know, when I got pulled over with him and the bong rolled out of the thing. And all they did was they took all of our we had a couple pipes and a bong and, like like, I don't know, less than a nickel a weed. I mean, it was just a very small amount of weed, which would be the it would get 50 people high today, but back then, it would barely get three.

Speaker 1 (36:33): Anyway, they all they did was tell us that we could not go in the military if they arrested us

Unknown Speaker (36:39): for this. What a problem.

Unknown Speaker (36:40): Would not

Unknown Speaker (36:40): be able to

Speaker 1 (36:41): get a government job. Oh. You would not do you realize do you realize how you're restricting your future by doing this? And they made us, they told us that they were making us, they were giving us a break and giving us a chance because he worked hard, and I had two jobs and all this kind of because we they ask all these questions about what do you do, where do you work, to make sure and we were working we were both working full time. And, and then they were just telling us how bad weed was forced and all this, and it'll do this, that, and the other.

Unknown Speaker (37:10): And, you know, and I didn't it was like, whatever.

Speaker 0 (37:14): I always love the one from I think

Unknown Speaker (37:15): it was the nineties where they're like, weed not even once and the guy smokes weed and

Speaker 0 (37:20): he turns gay or something. It was so funny. Yeah. Oh,

Unknown Speaker (37:22): that was Well, those are not for the nineties. Those are from the sixties.

Unknown Speaker (37:25): Oh, really?

Speaker 1 (37:25): They were made there's fit forties, fifties, and sixties. Forties, they did them for the jazz because

Speaker 0 (37:30): they explode? What was the one where that guy's head explodes?

Speaker 1 (37:35): I don't know. I I remember this LSD where you take a hit ass and you jump out a window and kill yourself.

Speaker 0 (37:40): I they I've heard many stories like that in reality.

Unknown Speaker (37:43): I I can see where that actually happens.

Unknown Speaker (37:45): Yeah. That makes sense.

Unknown Speaker (37:46): You know.

Speaker 0 (37:47): I remember that happened at George Mason when I was in high school. Yep. And the dealer got twenty years

Speaker 1 (37:54): to life. That was before you went to Denver and your mother was freaked out. Yeah. Somebody at Denver jumped out of a window too.

Unknown Speaker (38:02): Oh, that was Boulder. Yeah. Yeah. Boulder. Boulder.

Speaker 0 (38:04): And they fell on a bike rack. Yes. And I think they split them in half or something.

Speaker 1 (38:09): They they didn't really go into what happened, but they were looking for the person who sold it. I'm like, I I don't think that I'm willing to I mean, if you're gonna have dealers that are liable, then you should have gun gun sellers liable.

Speaker 0 (38:23): Well, if you're buying drugs, you should be liable for what you're putting in your body. That that guy should not go to jail for murder if you willingly bought the drugs and you willingly took them yourself.

Speaker 1 (38:35): Well, see, the whole the whole mentality of the police and of society is that my kid would never do this unless you pushed it on him. That's why they called the drugs when I was a younger the dealers pushers. They're out there making you do it, and you would see all the little all when I when I was in sixth grade, they had these, what's his name? Not Cher's husband, Sonny Bono. He did all of these anti drug things.

Speaker 1 (39:09): And it was like, yo, dude. People are gonna come up to you, and they're gonna talk to you and say, do you wanna be cool, man? And they're gonna give you weed at first just so you get on it, man. You don't wanna be on it. And if because if you're on it, then you'll then then all of a sudden, things you're just gonna change.

Speaker 1 (39:25): Your grades are gonna go down. This and it and it was just it was just lies.

Speaker 0 (39:29): I can count on one hand how many times I've received free drugs. I think it's zero.

Speaker 1 (39:35): Count on any hand because they get zero. Fucking happened.

Unknown Speaker (39:39): Yeah.

Speaker 1 (39:39): The only free drugs I've ever got is when they mow my lawn and they put it in a baggie and they try to sell it to me for money.

Unknown Speaker (39:47): Oh, exactly.

Unknown Speaker (39:48): And then they throw it back in the trash and I pull it out and I realized that it was grass. It was not that kind of grass. It was a different kind. Oregano in a bank. Oh my gosh.

Unknown Speaker (39:56): Yeah. Yep. That's a

Speaker 0 (39:57): good times. Yeah. But no. What I what else happened? So after the pandemic, I graduated, or I guess during the pandemic kind of the right at the tail end, I graduated from University of Virginia.

Speaker 0 (40:08): I moved out here, and then our relationship changed a third

Speaker 1 (40:11): Well, you didn't get the acting bug. You didn't have that, and and you didn't have that. I did. Your last year at UVA, you got it. And then you went out and you said, okay.

Speaker 1 (40:20): I wanna I wanna pursue this. And then and I was like, okay. You gotta do it. You gotta pursue it. You gotta go to the place where it's at, LA.

Speaker 1 (40:27): You you wanted to do it there. And it was like, okay. So you gotta go after it with Gusto. And you went out there and you realized that it you of course, just like at UVA, wherever you went, whatever industry you went into, you were gonna kill it. You destroyed And crazy,

Unknown Speaker (40:43): isn't it?

Speaker 1 (40:43): You destroyed college when you went there because you made everybody get COVID, and they had to shut everything down. Exactly. Out to LA, and you made the director strike and the actors strike.

Speaker 0 (40:52): I'll tell you. As soon as I finish this movie, I swear it's gonna like, oh, yeah. We don't buy new IP anymore. It's just gonna be that. That's gonna happen.

Speaker 0 (40:59): I don't know what's gonna and I'm gonna have to pivot again. But yeah. No. When I'm when I'm down

Unknown Speaker (41:04): It's never finishing. It's always when you first walk through the door, you get hit. You you get ready. You start to launch it, and then you get a naily board in the face. So rude, happened.

Unknown Speaker (41:13): Man. And the inspirations

Speaker 0 (41:15): forever after the strike too in a terrible, terrible way.

Speaker 1 (41:19): What do you what do you think happened? I I I think I I when the heart grows fonder with distance, no. I don't think that's true. I miss you. I I treat you more as, someone I don't need to tell what to do, but someone that, I think you're you know, it's that whole becoming a man thing.

Speaker 1 (41:40): But, I mean, with every passing year, except for about seven, you matured.

Speaker 0 (41:47): Yeah. So I think so.

Speaker 1 (41:48): I didn't have any I didn't have any problem with that. So I was like, but, you know, when you went out there, it's like I saw that that the more Tether I gave you, the more that and you would you would not take too much. You were not, you were

Speaker 0 (42:04): not Tether is in what year? What year are you referring

Speaker 1 (42:07): to? When I say Tether, I'm saying line. Like, you know, okay. Go do your thing. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (42:12): And, I mean, you're an adult and all that kind of stuff and free and do whatever the hell you want. And but I when I think when I think of that, I think of how much you let loose of someone, And I feel like, I mean, I hang on to you right now because I love you. And Mhmm. I don't know what, you know, what is the as far as and it's like, this is a connection. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (42:40): It's a great connection for me. I I don't

Speaker 0 (42:43): see realistically like, when I was 18

Unknown Speaker (42:46): Are you my equal?

Speaker 0 (42:48): I saw us becoming estranged. We definitely could have become estranged. Oh, yeah. But then we reeled it back in somehow.

Unknown Speaker (42:54): I don't know. The baseball. The baseball bat was the bat. That was

Speaker 0 (42:57): pretty crazy. Yeah. Yeah. I think it was the Papa John's job and then I was like, well, they're they're actually right. I should probably go back to college.

Speaker 0 (43:05): This really sucks. I don't want to do this my whole life and I think that might have been just the coming of story kind of me figuring out that yeah, let's go back to school because.

Speaker 1 (43:15): Well, that's what you have to do and most

Unknown Speaker (43:17): kids. Burnouts.

Unknown Speaker (43:18): Need to, they need to fail.

Unknown Speaker (43:21): Yeah.

Speaker 1 (43:22): Enough to figure it out and not have you there to hold them up.

Speaker 0 (43:27): You're never gonna go into accomplish anything if you are being told to accomplish somebody else's dreams or aspirations. That's just that's just the way it is. You gotta accomplish your own dreams or

Unknown Speaker (43:37): aspirations. Why every company I've ever been involved and I've never said, oh, I'm gonna put little Hepzibar Brown in it. Yeah.

Unknown Speaker (43:43): Which I I I actually thank you very much for that.

Unknown Speaker (43:46): If you

Unknown Speaker (43:46): There's a lot.

Unknown Speaker (43:47): If you had wanted it.

Unknown Speaker (43:48): Like that.

Unknown Speaker (43:49): If you had said when you were five, daddy, I wanna come and work at your company because this is fun because you came to my company a lot of times. 2012. A lot of people there. Too. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (43:58): But you never once experienced and, you know, showed any interest in doing that. And I was just like, well, you know, we're managing people or doing that. It wasn't your thing. And it's like Well,

Speaker 0 (44:11): I'll tell you. Now, I I will tell you, I don't think I understood what you actually did. Nobody told. I was like 17 or 90, like, I think I had a loose understanding of when I was 17 because I remember asking you many times of what you did from the time that I was, I don't know, 10 until I was 20 And I don't think I, yeah, really ever grasped it that way until I was 20, probably, not even 17. Yeah.

Speaker 0 (44:37): Like, I didn't understand the whole story until we we kinda

Speaker 1 (44:39): What's weird because you have to tell a story for what we used to do and, you know, and the simple story is is people know, everybody knows that SpaceX is going public. They're filed, they filed an Form S-one at the SEC. On that S-one, in the middle of it, is going to be on the left and the right, there's going to be legal counsel for the company and legal counsel for the people that are actually selling the securities, which are the underwriters. Those two legal counsel are generally top 100 law firms in the world. Those two legal counsel use my products to write that s one.

Unknown Speaker (45:18): There you go.

Speaker 1 (45:19): And the way they do it is they they look across thousands and thousands, every IPO ever written, and they look for summaries, and they look for the best description of the business. They want the least amount of static from the SEC, because it has to go through a regulatory thing to say. You have to say this, you have to have a risk factor section, you have to say what's bad, you have to say what's good, You have to show three years worth of financials. You have to do this. You have to do this.

Speaker 1 (45:44): And they have to fought every single one of those rules. That's what they have to do. And the underwriters, the guy that's selling securities, and attached to it are all these agreements like the compensation agreement that that Musk is doing, his employment contract. Every the law firm that wrote that is probably different from the two that are on the cover. That law firm used our product to write that agreement.

Speaker 1 (46:07): The the bankers that have that underwriting agreement that is attached to it, they used our product to look at that. The accountants, Ernst and Young, PwC that actually advised on the deal, the audited the deal and said the financials were true and correct and presented fairly. They used our tool to look at other companies like that to see how they presented. So it's like we were we were plugged in every which way from Sunday to all of the advisory people, to public offerings, to every public company that files a document at the SEC used our tool when I was at Global Securities Information, and then again, when I was Intelligized. We became the leaders because we were good at what we do, and, we had depth of knowledge, and we had a, we had an exceptional product.

Speaker 1 (47:03): We had an easy user interface, and, you should see me, and I'll sell it to you. See, this is what happens. I get I get passion. I get on and, you know, and you're like, shut up, Phil. Do you understand?

Unknown Speaker (47:14): That,

Speaker 0 (47:16): that you have less to do now that I'm older? I mean, that's an obvious question.

Unknown Speaker (47:20): But Yes. Do you

Speaker 0 (47:21): like you're missing something that you need

Speaker 1 (47:24): to do? It's not it's not less to do with you. It's less to do in general. I mean, what's happened now is now I have all the time in the world because I'm retired. So I would just like to hang out with you because you're fun to hang out with, believe it or not.

Speaker 1 (47:43): Not all the time. You know, three days on, couple days off, three days off, but you have a life. And I can't intercede into that life too much. Otherwise, I feel like that's not gonna let you grow. Well, I

Unknown Speaker (47:57): think about if we That

Unknown Speaker (47:58): makes sense?

Speaker 0 (47:58): Yeah. No. That does make sense. But I just think about if we didn't do this podcast, how how different our relationship would be. You know?

Unknown Speaker (48:06): Well, see, I I feel

Unknown Speaker (48:07): like it'd be very different.

Speaker 1 (48:09): I think we understand each other in a way that I don't think a lot of father sons do.

Speaker 0 (48:14): I completely agree with that.

Speaker 1 (48:15): And is it the right way? Fuck. I don't know. I mean, this is our way. And, you know, you and and and there's people that have told me and have told you that it has it has helped me get a connection with my kid.

Speaker 1 (48:31): And I and I love that. I love that as being the crux in the mission for this particular, endeavor for us. I think that's really cool. For me, the, connection that this goes with you is not we have to have a family phone call and talk about what oh, what'd you do this week? Oh, I went to the gym.

Speaker 0 (48:54): That's such a falsehood, dude. It comes across

Unknown Speaker (48:56): I pooped by no show

Unknown Speaker (48:57): of affection.

Unknown Speaker (48:58): I did my laundry. Oh, did did you clean did you make your bed even once? Did you empty your trash? You know? And you're like, no.

Unknown Speaker (49:06): I think a large part of our

Speaker 0 (49:07): relationship too is is kinda created on societal rejection in a way. Because the same thing that I went through in elementary school and throughout high school, it seemed like you almost lived a Like a parallel. I feel like I don't know if you've ever felt like you've blonde in your entire life, but I I haven't really. I haven't really I didn't feel that way at UVA except for like with Brian and that whole older crowd of graduate students in the theater program which is a very big micro or very small. Yeah.

Speaker 0 (49:37): Microcosm, I guess, small microcosm.

Unknown Speaker (49:39): Well, you force yourself into situations because you're lonely.

Speaker 0 (49:42): Exactly. Because I was a transfer in this side or the other and even today, it's like, you know what's funny though? It's like successful people not saying that I am successful but people that are a certain way and are societal rejected have a small group that they trust. You know? And people with large groups of friends I never trust because it's like, how could you possibly have time for 20 plus people in your life?

Unknown Speaker (50:08): Yeah. To Oh, you were talking about relationships properly. You can. That's not possible.

Speaker 1 (50:12): Of mine that I set quarterly, and he was telling me that he says that he has these events every few years, and we won't bring them up, and that it's very, very difficult for him to see everybody that he cares about because he has so many people that he cares about. And he said and he said, you know, I've only got maybe 200 lunches I can do a day with other people. I a year, and that's just not enough because I have about you know, and you're, like, thinking like, oh my god. You can't you can't you can't be close to that many people. You can only be close to really close.

Speaker 1 (50:53): And I feel like seeing somebody quarterly is is it's pretty good.

Unknown Speaker (50:59): I mean,

Unknown Speaker (51:00): for a couple hours. It's

Unknown Speaker (51:01): not for weeks.

Speaker 1 (51:02): You know? And then I have buddies like, Bushka that I go away for a week at ten days at a time, and I see him every week. And I talk to Conrad every week. I talk to Doggie every quarter. I talk to Neil every quarter.

Speaker 1 (51:14): I see Jeff weekly. I'm now seeing some of your friends weekly that are, local. You know?

Speaker 0 (51:20): Yeah. I think the spread for me is so wide too because I got people in Ohio. I have people in Virginia.

Unknown Speaker (51:27): I have. Oh my god. I have somebody in Ohio too. Who's that?

Unknown Speaker (51:29): Everywhere. Mister Brian.

Unknown Speaker (51:31): Oh, I love Brian. Shut up, mister Brian. Man.

Speaker 0 (51:33): He just went to Florida, funny enough.

Unknown Speaker (51:35): I know.

Speaker 0 (51:36): He was telling me that he doesn't like Florida. He said

Speaker 1 (51:38): But he went to visit his sister and she's Yeah. A wonderful person.

Unknown Speaker (51:41): So Yeah. She's great.

Unknown Speaker (51:43): She's the good part of that family.

Unknown Speaker (51:45): Yep. Brian is

Unknown Speaker (51:46): the best I can't wait till get to the end of this. We're talking about you and we're saying that your sister's better than you. Okay?

Speaker 0 (51:51): Yes. That is exactly what we're saying.

Speaker 1 (51:53): Yep. That's what we're saying, Brian. So I hope that makes you feel bad, and you call me up and you give me shit about it. Okay? Because I deserve it.

Speaker 1 (52:02): And it's it was all Zach's idea. Anyway, the the

Speaker 0 (52:07): I can't believe I'm 27. Isn't that weird?

Unknown Speaker (52:09): Oh, god. You were old.

Unknown Speaker (52:10): 27 today.

Speaker 1 (52:11): Let's let's let's step for a minute. Yeah. Okay? At at 20, 09/3085, May '85, I graduated from college. Right?

Speaker 1 (52:25): Graduated from college after all my offs and on. So I was born in '59. So that is 26 years old I graduated from college. Okay? I worked for a year and a half at Simon and another company from then.

Speaker 1 (52:46): So I had just started my first professional job. I would have been at your age, three months into it. And it was a coat and tie collar go SEC research club. You know? So that was my I that's why I always look at you, and I I I think about where you are and about judging and saying, okay.

Speaker 1 (53:08): So, I will look for I mean, early on, I'm always like, so what are you gonna do? What's your plan? How long is it gonna be? Success. Success.

Unknown Speaker (53:16): Success. But it's not. Hit the brakes a little bit.

Speaker 0 (53:21): Oh, I've hit a nightmare of a of a career aspiration. No. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely.

Speaker 0 (53:26): You're a nightmare of a career aspiration that I chose. Yeah. And it was is it gonna work Well, hopefully. I mean I mean, right? But Well,

Unknown Speaker (53:35): I mean,

Speaker 0 (53:35): yeah. You know, I but I learned, oh, you know what's crazy? I need to tell you this.

Unknown Speaker (53:40): Let me say something stupid really quick.

Unknown Speaker (53:41): Oh, yeah.

Speaker 1 (53:42): You learn as much from failure as you do from success.

Speaker 0 (53:44): Completely agree with that. Completely agree with that. I think you almost learn more from failure.

Speaker 1 (53:49): Know? Probably learn more, but you don't get to eat. So there is that.

Unknown Speaker (53:53): Yes. That's that's what

Unknown Speaker (53:54): you don't get to learn. And I would like to learn to eat.

Speaker 0 (53:57): Oh, what I was gonna tell you so the editor, right, we had a meeting yesterday with the about the Mongolian project, And I saw it on a TV for the first time, the footage. Yeah. And wow. It was on an '88 inch TV. It was huge.

Speaker 0 (54:10): Wow. Whatever size what size TV do you have? It's like, was it 88, 77?

Speaker 1 (54:17): No. Sixty, seventy two, something like that.

Speaker 0 (54:20): Well, this is like a slightly larger one. Yeah. And maybe it's 80 inches. Does does it go by 80? I don't know.

Unknown Speaker (54:26): I don't know how TV's measured. Whatever.

Unknown Speaker (54:27): French 88.

Speaker 0 (54:28): But man, does it look good? Because I've only seen it on laptop and I've only seen it on a phone.

Unknown Speaker (54:34): So, I've never seen it blown up.

Speaker 0 (54:35): But wow. Even without color, it is, this is, it's, I, I really chose something that was incredibly difficult to do and it's finally, I mean, the trailer was wonderful. It's moving. But the trailer is not a whole movie, you know? Right.

Unknown Speaker (54:49): And it's like, but man, does it look good? It looks so.

Speaker 1 (54:52): That's what I'm looking for and I I I'm I'm I'm when we talk about things that I'm proud of or things that you've done, it's like, you did the cartoon. Yeah. You did the you did the 400. Launched it the other day. You got 4,000 views.

Speaker 0 (55:07): Crazy crap. The first thing I ever directed to.

Unknown Speaker (55:10): But it's years. I mean, you've been doing this for.

Speaker 0 (55:12): No. It took two now. Do that. It took two years.

Speaker 1 (55:15): Started this industry in this path three years ago in LA. Three, three and a

Unknown Speaker (55:20): half. Yeah. Something like that.

Speaker 1 (55:21): Three years. You've been you've been doing the day. You've been eating the poop in the gutter. You've been saying hi to all the homeless people for almost three years, and now you're finally getting a little dead. And you would skip you got you got Theo you got into the Oh, the festival.

Unknown Speaker (55:38): Film festival. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (55:39): That was that was a that was a little taste. Exactly. Was last April. But think about it. The distance between, you know, little happiness successes.

Speaker 0 (55:49): Well, that that whole project too, was an executive producer and I helped get financing for that. Yeah. And it was like, hey, why don't I just direct myself? And then that's what I did.

Unknown Speaker (55:59): That's how you learn. Yeah. That's what I did. Well, you you learn you know what's

Speaker 0 (56:02): funny is somebody told me this as soon as I moved here. I was acting in Judge Mathis because those are all actors. It's sorry to ruin that for your listeners. It's all actors in the courtroom and also the whatever defendant and what have you and this woman told me, well, you should try a thousand different things. You shouldn't just try acting.

Speaker 0 (56:20): You should try to produce. Right. You should direct. You should try to write. You should try to DP.

Speaker 0 (56:26): You should try to gaff. And I was like, that's stupid. Why why would I ever do that? And little did I know I I did that. Find out what you really And now I'm a director.

Speaker 0 (56:35): Right? So it's like

Speaker 1 (56:36): There's two things. You find out what you like to do and what you're good at and what will pay the bills.

Unknown Speaker (56:44): Exactly.

Speaker 1 (56:44): Three things, I guess. Cause it's there's there's there's three things in life. What you like to do, what you're good at, and what pays the bills, right?

Speaker 0 (56:52): Exactly. I think it was somebody that said, you need a hobby that will eventually make you money. You need a job that makes you money now and then you need an a physical kind of hobby that will keep you fit. And I I agree with that. I think that that's a good trifecta to run by.

Speaker 0 (57:09): Yeah. But I think at one point you need to give up that job in order to fully focus on your hobby or your passion. If it is a passion, if it is. Because

Speaker 1 (57:19): passion's passion's nice but passion's gotta be realistic.

Speaker 0 (57:25): It can't be an oversaturated market. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (57:27): I've seen I've seen too many passionate people. Well, I don't I don't think crashing and burning is a problem. It's being unable to stop.

Speaker 0 (57:41): Yeah. Like, there was those bar rescue episodes where the woman was like, yeah. We put $2,500,000 into this restaurant. And it still hasn't turned a dollar in profit.

Unknown Speaker (57:52): You're at a restaurant? Oh, yeah. You worth if you're worth 500,000,000 or 200,000,000, yeah. But

Speaker 0 (57:59): Exactly. Thing about movies too is there was this guy that I know that put 1,500,000 of his own money into a movie, which is one that's crazy. But you should really try to limit your fur especially directorial debut. You should try to do it for as cheap as possible. And that's why I didn't choose narrative either because I didn't think that I had the skill set one to direct a narrative or to write a successfully or successful narrative.

Speaker 0 (58:25): I didn't think I did, but I knew that I was a good observer of stories. And I knew that the Western world is not very familiar with Mongolian tradition. That though at the same time, what we search for in the Western world is purpose. What they have found in Mongolia is such that and in this documentary, we've you've very blatantly see that they have found this thing called purpose.

Unknown Speaker (58:48): I think we should do a move one on the documentary because you're you're moving into the sales of

Unknown Speaker (58:52): it. Yeah.

Unknown Speaker (58:52): Would you like buy tickets now?

Speaker 0 (58:55): Buy tickets now. Preorder on my website. But no yeah I think for the.

Unknown Speaker (59:01): It's a wonderful thing.

Speaker 0 (59:01): Yeah. No. It really is. And they are the most kind people I've ever met in my life. But as far as in my life.

Speaker 1 (59:10): As far as you and me and where we are, it's it's it's it's a path where there's wonderful epiphanies and there's horrible. Oh, yeah. Whatever they are.

Speaker 0 (59:26): Oh, there's been a lot of terrible stuff, but you know what? You gotta get through it.

Speaker 1 (59:29): It hits. You cum. You eat it. You you basically shovel it up, and then you move on to the next one. And

Speaker 0 (59:35): The art of continuing. The art of continuing is

Speaker 1 (59:38): really Well, that's the hardest thing to do is to say Is

Unknown Speaker (59:40): to continue.

Unknown Speaker (59:41): Yeah. Fuck you. You're gone. You know? Exactly.

Speaker 1 (59:45): I I've done that. I've done that to things, people, companies, mostly companies that were business associates or dealings that fucked me. And, and I have a very, as Mitch says, a buddy said, the Browns, man, there ain't no gray. It's black or white.

Speaker 0 (1:00:08): That's so funny because it really is. It really is.

Speaker 1 (1:00:11): And I'm, like, I'm the guy that you can walk up to me, and you can spit my pocket. You can cut me. You can steal a bunch of money, but there's there's somewhere in there is this line. And when you cross it, it it I I I feel differently about you. And once I feel differently about you because I have a certain feeling for people that are close to me that I love or like a lot, and that that's my connection.

Speaker 1 (1:00:39): And if you break it, it took twenty years or ten years or five years to build it, It cannot be repaired. It has to be a new connection, a new thing. It's not. And that's just, you know, my own quirky weirdness. You know?

Speaker 0 (1:00:57): No. There really is it's black and white for me. I'm very good at getting rid of relationships that don't help me. You know, that don't add to my life and only take and I do not like affiliate myself with those people.

Speaker 1 (1:01:12): And and and adding doesn't mean like you gotta give me money or

Unknown Speaker (1:01:15): make me food.

Unknown Speaker (1:01:16): It's more like

Speaker 0 (1:01:18): In emotional way, in a conversational way as such. Right. Yeah. No. That's for sure.

Unknown Speaker (1:01:23): What do

Unknown Speaker (1:01:23): we have? Like, I do charity stuff and I and there's many charities that I hate. Do you know

Speaker 0 (1:01:30): where we're at for time on this? Yeah.

Unknown Speaker (1:01:33): A little over an hour.

Speaker 0 (1:01:34): Oh, a little over in a while. Yeah.

Unknown Speaker (1:01:35): You're you're you're talking, man. Well, this is going after so long.

Unknown Speaker (1:01:38): Well, we gotta go. We gotta get a couple in the bag before I come back. I just need to do one when I come back on the fourth. Yeah. When was the last time I even saw you?

Unknown Speaker (1:01:47): I don't remember.

Unknown Speaker (1:01:49): Moab? Out here? Was it Moab?

Speaker 0 (1:01:52): No. Did oh, yeah. Mom came out here. You didn't.

Unknown Speaker (1:01:54): I didn't. I wouldn't she would let me.

Speaker 0 (1:01:56): No. Yeah. That was I didn't watch the door. A year?

Unknown Speaker (1:01:59): That was a year. No. What are you looking? Near. It was, like, three months ago.

Speaker 1 (1:02:02): It was February 19.

Speaker 0 (1:02:05): Wait. Moab was not this year.

Unknown Speaker (1:02:07): Oh, no. Moab. I'm thinking of New Orleans. New Orleans was the last Oh, there we go. There we go.

Unknown Speaker (1:02:12): Yeah. Yeah. New Orleans. That was three months. Okay.

Unknown Speaker (1:02:15): Gotcha.

Unknown Speaker (1:02:15): I was like four months ago. Did I swear I saw you?

Speaker 1 (1:02:18): So hugs and kisses. I can't wait till you're in the same room again.

Speaker 0 (1:02:21): Check out the check out our website, chpproductions.com and also recordmyfather.com. Each has a hyperlink to such episodes. We need to figure out how episode one fifty is doing because apparently, it didn't go on Spotify for some reason.

Speaker 1 (1:02:35): Look at the Instagram for

Unknown Speaker (1:02:39): Console updates.

Speaker 1 (1:02:41): Yeah. No. The Instagram for the 400,000 blow up.

Unknown Speaker (1:02:46): Oh, yeah.

Unknown Speaker (1:02:47): It's a bitsy spider. That's really, really cool. Look at that. Very proud of at that. Alrighty on.

Unknown Speaker (1:02:52): We'll talk to you later. Bye bye.